April is Alcohol Awareness Month and the beginning of professional baseball. Hot damn! There is nothing like going to opening day, and purchasing three oversized 32 ounce beers then perching just behind home plate in an air-conditioned dome to watch the game. In Tampa the weather gets so hot 92 year olds often fall out during routine observation of sporting events, hence the reasoning to enclose the diamond with a dome to ensure maximum capacity of fans during the scorching heat of the Florida summer. Why would anyone want to move an awesome establishment in Downtown Saint Petersburg full of bars and weirdos to Tampa.
Tampa has its perks, and it’s definitely the best place to see 400 lb. 4.3 second sprinters attack a quarterback with the intention to permanently injure them. This crowd is angrier than the baseball crowd, and the location naturally speaks to such violence. Baseball on the other hand is a laid back sport with hours of unrelenting waiting, only to be properly dealt with by abiding in alcoholic beverages to pass the time. Thus, its surrounding should be ascetically similar. This isn’t to say football fans and baseball fans don’t have commonalities, and in many cases aren’t the same individuals. However, the games are attended for different reasons with baseball being America's pastime, a dream surpassed, and football being America's current state of reality and future a nasty every man for themselves society out to hurt everyone who is not on their team.
This is the conundrum in Tampa Bay to leave tradition behind, get the hell out of that dome, and move to where the grass is greener in Tampa. However enticing the prospect of moving the organization sounds they aren’t having luck getting the greedy Florida taxpayer to build them a new stadium. Hell, the retirees have a seriously hard time paying to fund public schools, they are close to death and don’t give a damn about the next generation. They were the generation of swine after all.
Budweiser has its place and as much as I like an I.P.A. a bud can’t be beat at a baseball game. They go down smooth, and are very refreshing. Not too hoppy so anyone regardless of pallet adaptation can enjoy them. They are damn filling though and the alcohol content is low, it’s not Guinness low but that’s another story for another time. Natty Ice will definitely get you hammered faster and if money isn’t on your side or you’re in a hurry that’s the way to go. That being said if you are at a great American event like a baseball game then the Budweiser is your best bet. Beware; Yuengling might seem like an appropriate option but the alcohol is low yielding less than stellar results.
The Rays will move if not to Tampa then to Portland, but their time is dwindling in St. Pete, The Burg, or any other silly name you use. I object and like big time politics it doesn’t matter because corporate interest is the deciding factor. Stop! Go to the Trop! Watch the game! Soon it will be gone!
Looks like it's off to Denver soon. Stay tuned.
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